update + thoughts

hello again, friends!

here i am with another blog post to update you on what i’ve been up to & needless to say, i’m pretty surprised with myself & keeping up with this whole blog thing because it actually makes me pretty nervous to document this journey of mine.  however, every time i read another woman’s blog, Instagram, etc., it gives me so much encouragement, hope, & knowledge, so i hope to do the same for someone else 🙂

i think in my last post i talked about meeting my oncologist, so let me think where i’m at now…

it’s sunday, may 20th, & that means this week is THE week—chemo begins.  On the 24th of this month, I’ll be starting chemotherapy and can I just say that I am not very stoked about that.  I will say that I am “excited” (for lack of a better word) to KILL this cancer and get it the heck out of my body.  Speaking of my body—this thing is AMAZING!

If you don’t already know me personally, like on a real level, you might not know that I am terrible with all things needles, hence, why I will not get a tattoo.  But God wants me to get over that fear, apparently, because needles are my life now.  And not just those baby needles they use to draw my blood, I’m talking BIG needles.  Like the needle used for Zoladex injections, for example.  I received my first Zoladex injection last week and let me tell you now, that was not fun at all.  That needle looked like a drinking straw.  Okay, I’m being a little dramatic… but it was big, I swear.  I didn’t look as my nurse injected me though.  I held Andrew’s hand and then the nurse stuck me near my bellybutton and I yelped, “OUCH THAT ACTUALLY DOES HURT!” lol and he (the nurse) apologized a few times, bless his heart.  It only lasted a few seconds because my nurse did it so quickly, thank the Lord, but dang… that hurt.  If you don’t know what Zoladex is for, here’s the quick version: stop estrogen + put ovaries “to sleep” for a little bit + reduce recurrence.

It only left teeeeeeny little mark, too, & it’s already gone now!  so that’s a good thing 🙂

zoladex injection aftermathzoladexinj

next up: my port placement.

I got my port/port-a-cath placed this past Friday.  I was a nervous wreck for that.  I have never had any type of surgery or IV pain medicine, so I was freaking out inside.  But with a little (a lot) of prayer, having Andrew by my side, and talking to the AMAZING WOMEN I’ve come across (hi Samantha, hi Dani, hi Jocelyn, hi Natessica!), I got through it.  Oh and the team that took care of me that day were awesome, too!  I’ve been really lucky so far to have such kind nurses and doctors.

As I laid on the table while the doctors + techs prepared me for this procedure, I was flipping out inside.  I even said a few times, “just don’t let me die, thank you” HAHA.  But I really meant that, so I am not ashamed.  I’m sure anyone out there who has had a port placed is thinking “oh my gosh, calm down, Taylor…” but I will not!  Let me live, okay lol.  Anyway, I was not put under full anesthesia, just a “twilight” anesthesia—I fell asleep towards the end.  The worst part of the entire experience was the lidocaine injections.  Ohhhh man… that hurt.  Like, a lot.  I may have shed a tear or two, but I got through it!

 

So, that’s really it!  I have my dreaded PET scan on Tuesday (pray for me) and then chemo on Thursday.  I may or may not update you all on chemo, it depends on how I feel… but know that I am SO grateful for every single person that reads what I have to say and sends me positive, encouraging words.

Do not focus on what God does, but focus on who God is.

 

love, taylor

4 thoughts on “update + thoughts

  1. Anita Luna

    Honey your stronger than you know !!! I go for my portacath Tuesday. I feel ya. Just remember Cancer can’t cannot shatter hope nor can it destroy your confidence!! We are all praying for you and love you!

    All our love and prayers,
    Auntie Anita 💕😘

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  2. douglas lazorick

    What happens in a PET scan? I just had my first MRI a couple weeks ago. We are all pulling for you. Be fierce Taylor 🙂

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    1. kuwtaylor Post author

      hi doug! so, in a PET scan, you are injected with radioactive dye & then sit for about an hour. then they take you back into the machine that looks similar to an MRI & you just lay there while they scan you haha. a PET scan searches for fast metabolizing cells (e.g. cancer cells) in the body to see if the cancer has metastasized or not!

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  3. Sheryl Coccaro

    Dear Taylor,
    I keep you in my prayers every morning, and every night. I keep you in my heart every waking hour, I have insomnia, so you are there a lot.
    You don’t know me, and I don’t know you, but let me tell you, most of the women in my husbands family have gone through this. And, I am so happy to tell you, they are all alive and well. I know, after watching Kelli Frye, it’s a journey, but you are going to be just fine, when all is said and done.
    I will be with you on this journey, as long as you are. I don’t let anyone I know go through anything like this alone. My job at Presby, was taking care of family members p, while their patients were in surgery. I loved my job, so I am here for you.

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