I’ve Been Crushed.

Today is April 20, 2019 and one year ago on this day, I was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 26.

I’m having trouble trying to convey everything that I have been through and endured during this past year because it has happened so fast and I still can’t believe that I’m here right now.  Not because I thought I was going to die (well, some days I did, but for the most part, I did not) but because one year ago today, I was so deeply blindsided that I had absolutely no idea where I would be within the next HOUR, let alone the next year. Continue reading “I’ve Been Crushed.”

wandering in wellness

With my (active) treatment coming to an end and I am (hopefully) finished with all of my surgeries, I am now on my “journey” (kind of hate that word) to health + wellness.  So, what does that mean, exactly?  Well, I’m not so sure.  I am in no way a licensed nutritionist, naturopath, doctor, etc.  I still struggle every day with eating properly and incorporating more “natural” products into my lifestyle.  I will say, though… I try my best! Continue reading “wandering in wellness”

a new thanksgiving

Well, well, well… it’s been a minute.  Haha.  I think I begin almost every one of my posts with a comment about how I’m really not very good at keeping up with this thing, but it is what it is and here I am with a fresh new blog post!  I have a lot to update you all on, so let’s see how well I can navigate through the past month or so. Continue reading “a new thanksgiving”

MORE THAN PINK | Breast Cancer Awareness Month

So, yesterday was October 1st.  The beginning of one of my favorite months of the year.  Between the weather changing, the coziness of the fall season, Halloween movies, and just general spookiness, I have always loved October!  However, the month of October is also special because it is known as Breast Cancer Awareness Month (BCAM).  I’ve always been a supporter of BCAM because of the loved ones in my life who have faced Breast Cancer… but this year, it’s a little more personal to me since I am now a BC “thriver” (not really sure how I feel about that term but I don’t deem myself a survivor just yet!) Continue reading “MORE THAN PINK | Breast Cancer Awareness Month”

here’s the truth

Most of the time, I find that I can convince myself that I am strong, courageous, grounded, confident, and well.  And most days, that’s the truth—at least mostly the truth.  As with anything online, a lot of content written and posted by others is somewhat of a “highlight reel” and I’ve been guilty from time to time of writing uplifting and positive posts either here or Instagram or Facebook or whatever… but the truth is—it’s not always pretty and positive; it’s quite the opposite. Continue reading “here’s the truth”

through the valley

Wow. The things you learn in a matter of months… life sure is crazy. It’s been almost two months since I’ve last updated my blog and honestly, that’s because I’ve been so caught up in everything that’s going on that I felt almost too exhausted to think about all of it and then put it into words. But since I found a little bit of quiet time, I figured I could try.

It is now August 14, 2018, and that means I am now finished with the tough(er) chemo, the “red devil” as some call it or “AC”, and now I’m going in for my fourth Taxol treatment this Thursday. I will have a total of 12 Taxol treatments and they are given weekly, so, you do the math. If all goes according to plan, I should be finished with chemo sometime in October! I’m so ready to be done with chemotherapy… Continue reading “through the valley”

all the things

i’ve noticed that i’m actually kind of bad at keeping up with writing here, but it’s not because i don’t want to. i have this weird thing that i battle in my mind all the time that makes me believe that if i write too much, especially about my cancer journey, then i’ll somehow jinx myself & bad things will happen—totally not true, i know, but it’s something i often think about.

anyway, a lot has happened since i last updated you all on what’s going on with me. i don’t really know where to start, but i’ll list somethings:

Continue reading “all the things”

update + thoughts

hello again, friends!

here i am with another blog post to update you on what i’ve been up to & needless to say, i’m pretty surprised with myself & keeping up with this whole blog thing because it actually makes me pretty nervous to document this journey of mine.  however, every time i read another woman’s blog, Instagram, etc., it gives me so much encouragement, hope, & knowledge, so i hope to do the same for someone else 🙂

i think in my last post i talked about meeting my oncologist, so let me think where i’m at now…

it’s sunday, may 20th, & that means this week is THE week—chemo begins.  On the 24th of this month, I’ll be starting chemotherapy and can I just say that I am not very stoked about that.  I will say that I am “excited” (for lack of a better word) to KILL this cancer and get it the heck out of my body.  Speaking of my body—this thing is AMAZING!

Continue reading “update + thoughts”

meeting my oncologist

On May 10, 2018, I finally met my oncologist!  I had been waiting to meet her and see what she had to say so that I had a little more answers.  And thankfully, I left her office with just that!  I’m happy to say that I really like her and she was so upbeat, reassuring, and confident in my treatment and that was really important to me.  Andrew came with me and of course, that made me feel even more relaxed, so I’m really lucky so far!  For my own privacy, I won’t be using my oncologist’s real name, so I’ll call her Dr. M.

Dr. M explained everything to me regarding the plans for my treatment and answered all of mine and Andrew’s questions patiently and thoroughly—another good thing about her because we had a ton of questions 🙂  I expressed to Dr. M my fears and my uncertainty regarding my health and my future, and like my surgeon, she was very confident that I will make it through this.  Of course, it won’t be easy, but I’ll make it!  And that felt really good to hear from her.

Continue reading “meeting my oncologist”